Dear Chloe Belle - 20 Months

Dear Chloe Belle,
Today marks the day that you turn 20 months old and I am cognizant of the fact that there are only a handful of "month birthdays" left.  In four short months, you will celebrate your 2nd birthday and from there on out you will simply be 2, or 2 1/2, or 3 in March, and the number of months since your birth will escape my mind.

Your baby-ness is fading.

This weekend we are preparing for a garage sale and I decided to part ways with all things baby.  I believe that I have finally come to terms with the fact that you are our baby, the last baby, and that will be your place in our family.  As I was sifting through the bins and bins of clothes that you and your sissy wore, I came across the outfit that you wore home from the hospital.  It seems so tiny and sweet.  I just couldn't part with it, so I'm saving it for your Hope Chest.  One day, maybe you'll dress your little girl in it for a picture.

Your baby-ness is fading.

I think I best described you earlier this month when I wrote that you are all sweetness and spitfire.  You know what you want and what you don't want.  You are quick to push others away when you want your space or when you don't feel like being looked at or doted on.  Often, you won't allow me to push you in the swing at the park.  You push me away and favor being pushed by Miss Becky or Daddy.  That's okay with me.  For I know you.  I know that in the middle of the night when you wake, it is my name you call first before you begin with the endless string of "Daddy-s."  When you fall or get hurt, it's my name that you call out, and my chest that you love to snuggle on.  I know I have a place in your little heart.  That's the sweetness in your soul. 

Your Baby-ness is Fading.

You've recently undergone a vocabulary explosion, adding so many new words that I can't even keep track.  This week you said "Becky" for the first time as well as "Button."  You still call your milk "Mi-Mi" and prefer your bottle before bedtime over the sippy cup.  Oh, how I've tried, but you are relentless, and I am, well...tired.  I don't see the harm in the bottle, so I'll just follow you. You'll give it up when you are ready.

Your favorite game at the moment is BUS!  On our way to school you and Sissy shout "Bus!" every time we see one....you both giggle and laugh and get so excited.  It really starts the day off right to watch you two enjoy that together.  You've also taken to watching Baby Einstein before bed.  This is the only show that you will pay attention to for a full 20 minutes.  You love to sit in my lap and watch, and then you peer over your shoulder at me for affirmation when you say certain words describing what's on the screen.  My heart explodes.  This is my favorite part of the day.  This is your sweetness.

Your Baby-ness is fading.

Your favorite book at the moment is "Goodnight Moon" and you run for your bedroom when I say, "Chloe let's go find the mouse."  You shout "mouse, mouse, mouse" until we find our way on to the floor, you situate yourself on my lap, pull up your blankie, and I open the book.  Then, you point to the mouse on every page.  It's our routine.  It fills my soul. 

Your Baby-ness is fading.

And amongst the squabbles over toys and food, and tantrums to go "side" (outside) and the spitfire that makes you who you are, you show us the sweetness; the kisses on command, puppy hugs and loves, and gentle stroking of sissy's hair.  You are the perfect mix of all that you should be.  Strong enough to stand up for yourself and your own desires, yet sweet enough to melt a heart. 

Your Baby-ness is fading.

As you continue to grow right in to the pre-schooler you are destined to be, I hope you continue to use your voice and stand up for what you want.  I hope you soak in the world around you and know that you are loved beyond words.  I hope the qualities that make you, you, even at 20 months, never change. 

You have a gift, my love, and I hope you use it.

Love you Forever & Always,
Momma